Monday, October 3, 2011

Day 308 - The Best Times to Masturbate During Julie & Julia (pt.2)

Day 308.

Yesterday, I told you when you should masturbate to the first half of Julie & Julia. Today, I'm going to tell you the best times to masturbate to the second half of Julie & Julia. Yup, it's "cum" to this.


1:03:58 - Beat that shit, Julia. Beat it hard.


1:04:48 - If you get off on sadness and infertility, you will sure enjoy this.


1:21:50 - WHAT? ACTUAL NUDITY?!? MAYBE IF I SQUINT REALLY, REALLY HARD, I CAN... no... this is so wrong... and yet... it feels so right... just two naked Childs in a tub--the way porn was meant to be.


1:22:57 - Here's where you get to role-play that you are 11 feet tall and standing naked in front of Julia Child as she stares in awe at your 11-foot erection. Yes, in this scenario, your penis is as long as you are tall. It's called role-play for a reason.


1:25:38 - The moment of pure terror where the actors in the film realize that they are in a movie and that you are masturbating to that movie and that movie is Julie & Julia.


1:40:13 - Amy Adams' rack + Not Mark Ruffalo eating cake = MASTURBATORY GOLD


1:44:17 - Someone could have conceivably masturbated to this at some point. And frankly, that frightens (and arouses) me. I mean, that is a fair amount of back skin that Amy Adams is showing. I'm not saying that I've done it before (I've done it before), but in reality, I am sure there is someone out there desperate and insane enough to masturbate to this (me).


1:44:49 - For all you ladies out there... don't want to discriminate here, ya know? 'CUZ EVERYBODY CAN MASTURBATE TO JULIE & JULIA!!!


1:59:04 - Thank God it's over. I guess I'll have to wait until tomorrow to masturbate to this movie again... I mean, watch this movie again... yeah... while wearing.... pants.... without touching myself... err... yeah. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

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Julie & Julia Quote of the Day: "'Cuz let's face it. I never finish everything."
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9 comments:

  1. Isnt it interesting that in such a modern society that is still one of the most taboo things to do, to talk about, to speak out loud, to write even in secret in a diary or speak out loud in secret to a best friend.
    So to address such a topic on a blog for a 1000 people to read: well that takes GUTS, courage bravery.

    ReplyDelete

  2. Honestly i don't think its taboo, but damn, your making me laugh really loud in class man, congrats, you've made my day

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  3. Your parents must be so proud. :)

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