Sunday, January 9, 2011

Day 41 - Julie Powell: The Michael Vick of Cooking

Day 41.

Today, Michael Vick returns to the NFL playoffs as a starting quarterback for the first time since 2004. Formerly known for his ability to scramble and make spectacular plays as a rushing QB, his name has since become synonymous with dog fighting.

What up, dawg?

After the dog fighting scandal broke, Vick was sentenced to almost 2 years in prison and many thought that he would never play in the NFL again. They were wrong. Vick has since rehabilitated himself (and has presumably stopped fighting dogs) to the point where he is the starting quarterback for the Philadelphia Eagles, who finished 10-6 as the NFC East Conference champions. Not only that, but Vick himself has had an MVP-caliber season and his so-called redemption has been the feel-good story of the NFL this season (well as good as you can feel about a dog fighter).

Now how does this relate to Julie & Julia? Well it doesn't, really. Except for the fact that Julie Powell is also a fucking terrible pet owner.

Here's your new home, cat. I hope you don't need any food or water. I'm going to walk away now.

Every time we see the cat onscreen, it is inevitably being neglected/physically abused by Julie. Frankly, I'm surprised the ASPCA hasn't publicly disowned this movie. Julie Powell clearly doesn't give a shit about her cat (who doesn't seem important enough to have a name). And the worst part about this? She seems to be proud of it.

"She has signed on for a deranged ass." Heh heh.

No, but really. In her first blog post, she writes that she's "risking her marriage, her job and her cat's well-being." What a fucking bitch. Aren't responsible pet owners supposed to at least pretend that they care about their cat's well-being? Like, fuck, Julie Powell, you don't have to be pet owner of the year or anything--I'm not asking you to go out and buy luxury items like pet vaccinations or Fancy Feast--I just assume you have the basic common decency to not treat your cat like garbage. Boy, was I wrong.

"No food for you!"
"No couch for you!"
"No contemplating suicide by sticking your head into the oven for you!"

Julie Powell clearly hates her cat and it's rather unfortunate. Especially when the cat is sitting on a garbage can and Julie violently kicks said garbage can in her fury and her hatred of all things feline.

It's a bad screen-shot, but the subtitles say it all.

I don't even fucking like cats. But that doesn't excuse Julie Powell's behavior here. If you are a concerned pet owner or even a decent human being, I encourage you to write your local congressman/woman immediately and voice your outrage over this great pet injustice.

Also, fuck this guy. We can't let him win.

Oh, Google Image Search, you are so bountiful in your small pleasures!

For, you see, the Eagles are playing the Packers today. And as a Wisconsin native, I really could not handle seeing my team lose another wildcard playoff game after last year's, especially to a scumbag like Vick. So basically, I just used this whole post as an excuse to publicly declare my lifelong support for the greatest football team in the history of the league: THE GREEN BAY PACKERS!!!

LET'S GO PACK!!!

You'll know where I'll be at 4:30 pm ET. Let's just hope to God that by the end of the night, I find myself in a better place than Julie Powell's cat.

"What's the point of it all?"

UPDATE: Packers Win!!! Screw you, Michael Vick. Also, thanks to "shmuel" for showing me an article that Julie Powell wrote about her actual cat vs. the cat in the film. Check it out.

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Julie & Julia
Quote of the Day: "And I cried like a small, emotionally disturbed child."

16 comments:

  1. I sincerely hope that Michael Vick gets repeatedly sacked by Clay Matthews. Matthews' a beast.

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  2. Love this blog. I too have an obsession with J&J. Have you found yourself speaking as Julia? In that high-pitched voice?

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  3. Hooray, I can comment now!

    Now that the Eagles are going home to play golf, I have a lot of disappointed friends (sorry, mostly just about the Packers not getting eliminated), but they feel better when I point out that Vick has gotten quite enough out of his comeback season and hardly deserved any more! I laughed the hardest of all at this post;you can co-opt this J & J blog to talk about football anytime! My auto toast of the evening will be to your sanity.

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  4. Sylvia Plath reference? Or am I reading too much into it?

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