Day 4.
For today's viewing of Julie & Julia, I decided to take notes and count how many times certain things happen over the course of the film--how many times a word or phrase is mentioned, how many instances where a character acts this or that way, etc. And having seen it a few times already, I kind of already knew what I'd be keeping my eye out for. The mind-blowing results below.
Number of instances where...
Meryl Streep does something delightful (delightful smile, laugh, sigh, other delightful noises, etc): 87
Amy Adams acts like a bitch (does something self-important and bitchy): 63
Other bitches (all other women in the film) act like a bitch: 35
Stanley Tucci is supportive of his wife: 18
Chris Messina isn't Mark Ruffalo: 264
Characters talk about food: 24
Characters look at food: 9
Characters buy food: 6
Characters order food: 1
Characters prepare/cook food: 43
Characters screw up the food that they're preparing: 7
Characters eat food: 28
Non-French speakers attempt to speak French: 35
French speakers attempt to speak English: 16
Amy Adams' offscreen mother calls with an annoying fake Southern accent: 3
The head chef of Le Cordon Bleu looks like Colonel Sanders: 8
Number of times the word/phrase " _____ " is uttered or mentioned
Butter: 16
Mario Batali: 1
Bon Appétit: 12
Blog/Blogging: 21
Stiff Cock: 1 (surprisingly)
Boning Ducks: 5 (again, more often than you'd think)
Yo, my name is Amy Adams and I'm about to get naked: 0 (unfortunately)
Miscellaneous
Meryl Streep sex scenes: 3
Amy Adams sex scenes: 1
Graphic Meryl Streep sex scenes: 0
Graphic Amy Adams sex scenes: 0
Amy Adams nude scenes: 0 (Really, Julie & Julia? You're going to make me sit through a year of watching a clothed Amy Adams? Fuck you.)
Allusions to Julia Child's spywork: 5
Allusions to September 11th: 6
Allusions to the Bret Michaels reality show, Rock of Love: 0
Instances of Cat Abuse: 4 (someone should probably alert the ASPCA)
Jokes at the expense of Alcoholic Anonymous: 1
Number of children Julia Child can have: 0 (pretty sad)
Number of hat-making lessons: 1
Number of times Stanley Tucci is accused of being a homosexual: 1
Number of fake-looking lobster puppets: 1
Number of old Julia Child SNL skits played all the way through for no reason, contributing to the already bloated 2-hour run time: 1
Number of Jane Lynch marriages: 1
Number of black people with speaking roles: 2
****
Well, that's it for now, folks. I hope you enjoyed my statistical analysis of this modern classic. I'll leave it to you guys to draw your own conclusions about the film.
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Julie & Julia Quote of the Day: "We know it's long."
That was highly entertaining. Spot On Lawrence.
ReplyDeleteThis is amazing. I guess the feech was just a warmup for the big show.
ReplyDeleteThis is hilarious. You've made me look at the movie in a completely different light. I think you should attempt reading the book along the way as well.
ReplyDeleteI like that Julie & Julia is "making" you do this.
ReplyDeleteTotally hilarious! And don't read the book, it's just as boring. Discussing "Rock of Love" may have made it slighty more interesting.
Your attention to detail makes me smile :-)
ReplyDeleteThis is AMAZING! :D
ReplyDeleteI'm still resisting the urge to watch this fucking movie...barely holding onnnn.....
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ReplyDeleteWhat about instances of lobster abuse?
ReplyDeleteI'm racking my brain to find the black people in this movie!
ReplyDeleteHow the hell do you actually have the perseverance to count them all! hahaha
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